Do what makes your life better, not what makes you feel better
We all want to succeed.
Success is a concept that has captivated minds since the beginning of time. All want to taste the sweet fruits of accomplishing one’s goal. To bathe in glory.
There is one problem.
We assume the world is just. That leads to a curious perspective on the world. We assign value to the fact that people who have it easier than us have an advantage. Like there is an entity in the universe that procures justice.
Well, here is the truth to embrace – there isn’t.
That means the best way to succeed is to focus on what we have. Talking about others and their privileges gives you nothing. You can spend your whole life complaining about inequalities. Or work on fulfilling your dreams.
Disabuse yourself from thinking that you’re privileged to have what others have without effort. Use what you have, and find ways to succeed.
You’re Jealous Instead of Being Grateful
There are so many inequalities in the world.
Do you help yourself by shouting louder about what you lack?
Be honest. How far did you get by focusing on what others have? I’ve spent 10 years on that. In return, I felt resentment toward people because they succeeded and I didn’t.
I was comparing my day one to someone else’s day 1000, and I was jealous.
Envy was killing me. And I fed it every time I looked for excuses for not caring for my problems. It’s all too easy to say you can’t improve because the country you live in is shit. And hey, for some, it’s true, but is it for you?
Solutions to your problems don’t have to apply to others.
Build your life the way you want. Decide what is worth dying for, and let it kill you. Nothing short of that is worth your time.
What others have should serve you only as an example of what’s possible.
But you should do your homework on what you want. There is a high chance what you want the most is already in your possession. Worst case scenario, you already have the potential to get that.
Be grateful for knowing that you can become better than you are.
There is Always More of What You Don’t Have
I like the obvious, and it’s obvious you can’t get everything.
Until you think of it, you may delude yourself that it’s possible. What’s worse, you can decide to be happy only after getting everything. Imagine that, never content, because there is always more.
In all that overwhelming reality, you can choose another path.
The path of adapting to what is always here – change.
How? First, identify your goals. Second, find out how to use what you have to fulfill your goals Third, do the only thing in this world that has the potential to influence it– take action.
Try out, with the resources you have, to get what you want. If you fail, find what’s missing and get that, again focusing on using what you have. Then try again.
You’ll face problems either way.
Problemless life is off the table. So, do the second best thing and become great at solving them.
Overcome your limiting self-beliefs by testing out what you learned.
There is nothing better than a reality check to crush your assumptions. When you succeed, without all the resources others have, you’ll understand that the goal is to do your best with what you have.
Life is Not About Justice
I’m ashamed to admit that I thought life should be just.
In my naive approach, I wanted all people to have equal chances. I lied to myself that we all have the same potential. But we don’t.
Life is not fair.
We get some cards, and that’s it. We must play them. It’s the worst because you can start in a fucked up place. It’s the best because no matter where you start, it’s what you have.
The outcomes of your actions always depend on the cards you have.
The better the cards, the bigger your responsibility to society. By taking more responsibility, you atone for your privileges. It worked better for my soul than virtue signaling.
Once, I was in a forever complaining camp.
The government raised taxes, and that’s why I was poor. My friends were drinking, so I had to drink too. I was oblivious that I was born in Poland that I’m healthy, educated, and have a well-paid job.
I wanted to prove that I was a victim of the world and that the world was unjust. But that didn’t help me live.
What helped was asking how to use what I had most efficiently to get what I wanted. And then doing everything to make it happen.
No amount of shouting about injustice did that for me.
It made things worse. Because I saw injustice everywhere, and I was blind to the fact of how much I already had. Remember, if you can read this, you’re privileged like me. You have time, an internet connection, an electronic reading device, and probably a home.
Final thoughts
Stop whining about injustice and the lack of opportunities because you waste the only resource you can’t get back – your time.
In the most abstract sense, we’re all in the same situation. We have finite resources to deal with infinite problems. Some have more, some have less, but you have you.
Decide what you want, and act to get that.
Do you sometimes wonder how your life would look if you could get what you wanted?
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