Uneven fight with infinity and how to cope with it
You want a new phone. No, you want a new house. No, wait. Now, you want a new flat screen TV, oh no, now it’s a car. Second, later, you want to be a writer. Right after dreaming about traveling the world. And then you wake up.
What a disappointment. You can’t get what you want.
We all fight the infinity of possibilities. And we’re all losing. How does it feel? We wake up stressed, with no idea what to do with life. We live in a constant anxiety.
Because we have no direction. And without direction, nothing gives us true joy.
What is there to discover in getting along with infinity?
The freedom in your heart and your mind. Waking up ready to tackle another day. You’ll feel like a part of the life’s miracle. You’ll create a deep sense of meaning to help you face the world’s temptations.
Here is how you’re getting there.
Understand The Battle
You fight for your joy.
For openning your eyes in the morning without dread about what’s next. You fight for the opportunity to decide for yourself about what you want. You fight for the feeling of meaning that comes from doing what you choose.
It’s a confrontation of two extremities: the infinity of possibilities and the finitude of your life.
How do we deal with something that exceeds our capabilities of comprehension? We have to reduce it.
To reduce, we must decide what stats and what’s out.
When you chase every new thing or project, you let the infinity win. There is too much to do to wrap your head around everything. But what if you focus on a couple of critical things? What if you focus on your dreams? Then, you create a filter. You can use it to get a finite set from the infinite scope of reality.
You can do anything, but not everything. That’s what the battle is about – your ability to decide what’s not important now.
Use Your Resources Well
The ultimate resource at our disposal is time.
And you can never get it back. You can easily waste most of it if you have no priorities. There is too much to do. You need a way to decide what’s worth your time.
Know what you want. Use your dreams to create goals out of them. Focus on the handful 3-5 and ignore the rest. Ignoring what you don’t want is easy. The hard part is not learning to play the guitar when you want to because you have a dream that comes first.
Throw away what’s not crucial.
Whether it’s something you’d like to do or a memory about something you did, is it necessary now? Do you benefit from remembering your past? How is thinking about your former glory or shame helpful now? You can’t change the past. You can benefit from it only when you learn from it.
When you think about the future and you daydream for hours, is that helpful to you? Seeing all that future splendor may feel right, but do you spend enough time now to get it? People advise manifesting things with your thoughts, but that’s lame. To manifest your thoughts, use your body.
Laser focus on what’s important to you.
Plan to get what you want. Think about the past to learn what you could improve. Do one thing at a time. When you read, read. When you work, work.
Follow the vision you’ve created by transforming your dreams into goals.
Accept What’s Inevitable
The truth of life is we’re all going to die.
Sooner or later. But we push away that thought. We act like we’ll live forever.
And when we do, we wander from one useless idea to another.
You think you have all the time in the world. But you don’t. Accepting that is not surrendering. It’s a way to understand what’s inevitable.
Your past is as inevitable as your death.
Resisting these facts wastes time, which I did for years. Instead of working on my future, I lamented about my past. I pushed away the thought of dying and continued “having fun” (a euphemism for having no purpose). As a result, I had no idea what to do, and I thought I had time to figure it out later.
Acceptance returns the power to you.
You can work right now to get what you want tomorrow. Instead of constantly complaining about circumstances, you can accept them and act to get out of them. You can never get the calmness of acceptance from “having fun.”
Imagine working on a project that transcends you. Not only thinking about working on it but doing it with your hands and brain. Then, doing the work is a reward in itself.
Have fun while manifesting your dreams. Instead of resisting what’s inevitable and wasting energy, accept your circumstances and make the best out of them.
Choose Your Fate
Decide where you want to go.
Start going in that direction. On the way, you’ll build the life you want. Your goals will guide you. What is that you want? Not the society, not your parents, not your spouse, what do you want? Take your dreams and make goals out of them.
Use the direction you’ve created to guide you through the storms.
Should you watch another season of The Last of Us if you didn’t work on making your dream come true? Stop leading yourself to temptation. Make your environment work for you. Expose actions that you need to take, and hide the distractions. Based on your vision, decide what will be your next action. And execute it.
Build something that justifies your suffering.
Learn from your mistakes. Gather your experiences. Use them to create bricks. Lay one brick after another to build a shelter from life’s sorrows.
Facing life makes it bearable, but it also makes it enjoyable. The catch is you must face it willingly. And that is done by deciding what you want to focus on.
Life’s offers are infinite.
But my life is not. Therefore, I must decide what I want. I can do those couple of things that give me joy. But not much more.
So, do what interests you.
At some point in life, we have more ideas and desires than time. Then, knowing what you want and filtering out the rest saves life. Anything that is not along your current dreams is out. Get what you want first.
Life is too short to relive the past or worry about the future.
We can’t change the past. And we don’t know what the future holds. However, we can take responsibility for our lives and do the hardest thing there is: We can follow our dreams.
Let’s accept our finitude and use what we have to get what we want.
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